Showing posts from March, 2018

Loss and small moments of peace and hope

I wanted to share something personal today.  This weekend was my due date for our baby girl. Sadly several months ago I had a miscarriage and lost this sweet baby. This was my 3rd miscarriage in 3 years. For some reason, that doctors and many tests don't know, I can no longer carry a baby past my 2nd trimester. At my 12 week appointment everything looks great, and then at some point in my 2nd trimester the baby stops growing and in a very quiet room the ultrasound technician will become very quiet as she searches for a heartbeat and I know just by her face that we lost our baby. Three times this has happened and each time it is heartbreaking and devastating. Time stands still in that very small room as all our hopes, dreams and plans are instantly lost. It's a loss that I still can't put into words. A cloud of sadness that has never left me and sits on my shoulder at all times. Over the past 7 years I have drawn probably a dozen or more baby announcements. It's one o